Sarah | Counsellor / psychotherapist

Registrations

• BACP - The British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy

I offer therapy in

• ✓ English

Specialisations

• 1. Grief
• 2. Addiction
• 3. Stress
• 4. Anxiety
• 5. Depression
• 6. Couples therapy
• 7. Trauma PTSD
• 8. codependency
• 9. Abuse
• 10. neurodiversity

Most common issues I support people with:

Grief

What is grief?

Most people experience bereavement/loss of a loved one at some point in their lives. Grief is a natural process that helps us to cope with and accept our loss. The grief process involves a series of emotions including shock/denial; anger; sadness/pain; depression/guilt and acceptance. The grief process takes place not only when we have lost someone but also when we perceive that we have lost something - eg being made redundant; our children leaving home; infertility; adoption issues; being separated/divorced; retiring; a friendship ending; grieving for the loss of our childhood.

How can bereavement/grief counselling help?

If we get stuck in one part of the grief process (e.g., by not expressing/accepting our sadness/anger or by using addictive, self-harming behaviour to distract ourselves from our feelings) we can end up going round and round the grief process and these unresolved feelings can lead to depression/shame. This depression is different to the 'healthy depression', which is a natural part of grieving for our loss. Feeling depressed can have a negative impact on your relationships.

Seeing a counsellor can help you complete the grief process by allowing you to reclaim and connect to the disowned parts of you. Grief therapy can also help you to feel compassion for the vulnerable, anxious and stressed parts of you as well as helping you make sense of your experience. Practising relaxation techniques like mindfulness and meditation can help you through the grieving process.

 

Addictive behaviour

What is addictive behaviour?

While the form of addiction varies (people can be addicted to alcohol, drugs, smoking, sex, gambling, binge-eating, shopping, pleasing others / codependency) what is similar with all addicts is that their behaviour is an attempt to cope with overwhelmingly painful feelings. The addictive behaviour attempts to block out the painful feelings by distracting the person from these depressed feelings. However because the original feelings are not addressed, they remain unresolved. In addition to this, the addictive behaviour itself has a detrimental effect on relationships and can cause stress at work.

 

How can addictions counselling help?

When I see clients who have addictive behaviours, we will look at the underlying, painful feelings, often unresolved from childhood. I see the addiction as a symptom of these feelings. These feelings could be sadness, fear or anger.

Over time we will explore the link between feelings and behaviour and I encourage my clients to believe that, with awareness, they can create a gap between the feelings and self-harming behaviour. In this gap clients can use thinking interventions to challenge their limiting beliefs and by doing so realise that they have a choice about whether they want to do the addictive behaviour or not. In this way counselling can change the neural pathways in your brain.

I encourage clients to believe that they are addicted not to the drink, gambling etc but to the negative thoughts about themselves that happens after/during the addictive behaviour. During therapy we will also explore alternative coping strategies for managing these painful feelings- eg feeling compassion for the vulnerable, anxious part of you ; allowing yourself to grieve; using mindfulness, meditation techniques and being committed to a healthy lifestyle(choosing food to boost your serotonin levels, taking exercise etc).

 

How long will addictions counselling take?

For some symptomatic relief , therapy could be short term. But to resolve the underlying and often deep rooted causes of the addictive behaviour , counselling is often long term.

Stress

What is stress?

Stress is an inevitable part of life - we can't avoid it. Indeed a certain amount of stress is beneficial to our lives, as it can give us an adrenalin buzz/drive us forward to achieve goals. But for many of us stress can become overwhelming - we feel our lives are spinning out of control; we feel powerless; our anxiety becomes habitual and we feel depressed, stressed and angry. Stress can have a negative impact on our relationships.

People who have autism spectrum disorder (ASD) find social interaction stressful. 

 

How can stress counselling help?

Counselling can help you manage your stress by

• facing your fears
• identifying stress triggers
• challenging your negative thought patterns/beliefs about yourself and others. In this way counselling can change the neural pathways in your brain.
• helping you to accept what you can control (eg your response to a stressful event/choosing foods which boost your serotonin, dopamine levels) and what you can't control (eg the behaviour of others)
• learning to self soothe and nurture your vulnerable feelings
• identifying self-harming, addictive behaviour as an attempt to avoid stressful feelings
• accepting that we all feel stress/vulnerable
• learning mindfulness / meditation / grounding techniques

 

Anxiety

What is anxiety?

There are times in our lives when we all experience anxiety. It's part of being human. As a counsellor most clients that I see will suffer from some form of anxiety.

What causes anxiety?

Anxiety can be triggered by

• Stressful situations in the present which evoke unresolved feelings from the past

• Not feeling in control of our lives

• Anticipating and worrying about fearful feelings in the future

• Negative thought patterns , which can be learnt in childhood

• Finding social interaction difficult. Individuals who have autism spectrum disorder (ASD) can suffer from anxiety and social isolation.

 

What are the effects of anxiety?

Anxiety can result in

• low self-esteem
• depression
• panic attacks
• poor physical health eg headaches, poor immune system, high blood pressure
• difficulty in relationships
• difficulty in enjoying leisure activities
• erratic sleeping patterns
• increased stress at work

 

How can counselling help my anxiety?

Seeing a counsellor can help you to develop a tool box of different strategies to manage your anxiety. Here are some examples of techniques that I use to help my clients manage anxiety-

• Accept your anxiety as a vulnerable part of you and feel compassion for that part of you - we are all vulnerable
• Be aware that your anxious thoughts are not your enemy- they are trying to protect you
• Face your anxiety head on
• Allow your feelings without judgment rather than getting wrapped up in repetitive thoughts
• Accept it is the nature of the mind to be frenetic

• Use breathing techniques to relieve physical tension and focus the mind
• Use visualisation techniques and meditation
• Use mindfulness techniques
• Notice where your feelings are in your body
• Remind yourself that feelings will pass

• Replace negative, self limiting and judging thoughts with compassionate thoughts. Counselling can help to change the neural pathways in your brain.
• Focus your attention on anything pleasant in the present moment eg sunlight, warmth
• Talk to a friend
• Do some exercise - this will help you sleep and use up the adrenalin produced while you were stressed
• Eat healthily -choose food which will maximise your serotonin and dopamine levels

• Avoid caffeine/alcohol
• Notice what is happening in your body and in the environment around you at the present moment
• Identify addictive, self-harming behaviour as a distraction from extreme anxiety
• Practice grounding techniques
• Understanding what happens physiologically(eg the flight, fight, freeze or fawn response) in your body when you are anxious can help you manage the symptoms of anxiety

 

Depression

What is depression?

Depression has an impact on a person's behaviour, feelings and how they think about themselves, others and the world around them. Depression can vary from mild to severe and it can have a detrimental effect on your relationships and work life.

What are the symptoms of depression?

Symptoms can vary from person to person but signs to look out for include:

• Feeling tired, lethargic or having low energy
• Low self-esteem
• Little interest in hobbies/social life
• Difficulty concentrating
• Lack of sleep or over sleeping
• Feeling anxious, worried
• Aches in your body that have no physical cause
• Loss of interest in relationships
• Preoccupation with death

 

What causes depression?

There are many triggers for depression. Most people at some point in their lives will experience a form of depression or low mood. Factors that can cause depression are bereavement, financial worries, work stress, divorce/ relationship breakdown or adjusting to significant life changes. Sometimes painful events that happened to us in childhood can lead to depression in later life. In these cases feelings of anger or sadness are pushed down or de-pressed during childhood, but these feelings re surface in adulthood. In other cases some people can have a genetic predisposition to depression. People who have autism spectrum disorder (ASD) can suffer from low mood due to difficulties with social interaction.

How can I cope with feeling depressed?

There is help available, so you don't need to deal with depression alone. Here are some ideas for coping with depression:

• See a counsellor - counselling sessions can help you to understand why you feel depressed and accepting that grief is a process can alleviate some of the symptoms of depression
• Take regular exercise
• Spend time outdoors - walking in nature is soothing for your mind and body
• Eat healthily - choose foods which boost your serotonin / dopamine levels 
• Avoid alcohol

• Get enough rest
• Writing a diary - externalising your feelings by writing them down really can help
• Practise relaxation techniques like mindfulness and meditation 
• Identify any addictive, self-harming behaviour as a distraction from feeling painful feelings
• Replacing limiting beliefs about yourself, others and the world with compassionate ones. Counselling works by changing the neural pathways in your brain.

 

Fees

Sessions last for 50 minutes and cost £60 (individuals) / £67 (couples). Sessions are available during the daytime and evening time.

Availability (Opening hours)

Monday	8.00 am - 8.00 pm
Tuesday	8.00 am - 8.00 pm
Wednesday	8.00 am - 8.00 pm
Thursday	8.00 am - 8.00 pm
Friday	8.00 am - 5.00 pm
Saturday	-
Sunday	-

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